Malibu, my beloved. When I go to a room party, if they have any rum-based products at all, it’s likely not Bacardi or Captain Morgan. It’s likely Malibu. And, like with all room parties, there’s always too much alcohol and too few mixers, and the great thing about Malibu is that it’s easy to just drink it straight. I was actually surprised, when searching this subreddit, that there was only one other review for Malibu, because it’s so ubiquitous, it’s the only rum product in my grandma’s liquor cabinet. For many, it’s their gateway into the rum world. I also appreciate that, unlike Bumbu, Malibu doesn’t pretend like it’s a full-fledged fancy rum.

Review

Smell

The smell is like a pleasant coconut candy. I can’t even really smell the alcohol, it’s more like I am smelling an almond joy.

Taste

It’s very one-note, zero intrigue or complexity. It’s just sweet and coconutty, like drinking a boozy almond joy. There’s really not much to say.

Verdict 3/10

(Edited from 5/10 on 11/30/25)

Drinking it chilled, I give it a 5. It’s alright. It’s sweet, it’s coconutty, and yeah, it’s not a real rum, but it’s tasty and gets me drunk. If you’re reading this, wondering if you should buy it for yourself… I wouldn’t. But, I’ve never bought Malibu, it’s just always served to me.

November 30, 2025 Update:

This really doesn’t deserve a 5/10. It’s an ok cheap mixer, and there’s even some cocktails that are specifically made around it, but it really should be placed with all the other spiced rums and liqueurs, so it’s a 3/10.